Days 40 – 46 of Project 365

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Days 40-46 of Project 365

40. The Boy (Playing on the beach at sunset, plopping pebbles and making sand angels. I love my son.)

41. New Glasses? (The Boy's teacher had expressed concerns about his eyesight so he had drops in to dilate his pupils for an in-depth test. Nothing the matter with them, thank goodness, which is lucky considering how dreadful his paternal family's eyesight is.)

42. Scoot (A scoot along the promenade at dusk to make sure we just managed a small amount of fresh air! We're so fed up of this rain!)

43. Two-can (We've received a Toucanbox to review – good to see how they've progressed since we first reviewed them – and The Boy was getting to grips with all the activities and where to start! It's a great after-school play activity for us.)

44. Cheese (Thought it was a bit different from the standard sleeping Boy shot!)

45. Jump (There are oodles of puddles on the pavement outside of school, it comes from the council being so God-damned awful at repairing the highways and walkways. It does make for fun and games on the way home though!)

46. Destined Besties? (These two here. Born 11 hours and 55 minutes apart. In the same hospital. One room apart. Shared a pre-delivery room. Shared a post-delivery ward. Live one street away. Best friends in school. The absolute best friends. And his mum and I only discovered their connection a month ago.)

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TheBoyandMe's 365 Linky

Days 223-229 of Project 365

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223-228 of 365
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223. Mr. Bloom (We went to Margam Park in Port Talbot for the CBeebies Summer Roadshow, with a special show by Mr. Bloom. We were lucky and had press tickets to the show, which meant we had guaranteed seats even though it was free. I did take some cracking shots of Mr. B on stage, even if I did get 'heavied' about doing so.)

224. Golden (My wonderful birthday flowers. Love the depth of field on the 50mm lens I've got.)

225. Splash (I had frozen some of the Playmobil pirate treasure in a takeway container and put it on the tuff-spot for The Boy to get out. Once it had all melted then he realised he could sail his pirate boats in the water, and filled it up even more. The pirate islands were enlisted soon enough, and then he spent ages splashing the water about! Child-led learning at its best.)

226. Crinkle Cut (I bought one of the choppers that I'm always seeing the twins on Two Of Everything using, and The Boy helped me prepare tea. He loved it and I think his help will be 'needed' a lot more.)

227. People Watching (We met up with a friend and her daughter down in the Cardiff Bay Beach. The Boy spent ages burying his own legs and then examining everyone else and their activities.)

228. Joy (There's no mistaking how sad I am today; my brother came down to say goodbye to me today before he emigrates to Australia at the end of the month. I am heartbroken. I won't be visiting as it is too far and I can't afford it, so please don't suggest it. Yes there's social media but he will still be on the other side of the world, not in Oxford. This little boy cheers me up though, he is my joy.)

229. LolliBop (We spent the day in London at LolliBop in the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park, more to follow in a later post.)

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Country Kids Of All Ages At Coombe Mill

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We've been having the time of our lives this week in Coombe Mill. It is one of the most magical place I've ever been to. One of my happy places; all of us have it as our happy place. The photos and the words of those who write about it can never do the farm or grounds justice. Coombe Mill is more than just a farm holiday, it's about re-engaging with each other and enjoying time as a family, re-engaging with nature and the wonders of the world that we live in, and re-engaging with our lost selves during the chaos of everyday life.

Until you've experienced it, it's hard to understand Coombe Mill's magic.

That's why I was really eager to have the motley crew from Mummy Mishaps down for a day during our stay, and the fabulous Fiona was only too happy to agree and welcome them with open arms.

And we've had the best day of our holiday so far because we have stayed on site and done nothing but play. That goes for the 'grown-ups' as well as the children, even Fiona said herself that she had done nothing all day but "rediscover my own farm through the eyes of others!"

We started with the 9am feed run where the deer behaved themselves wonderfully and showed up out from the forest, and then progressed onto one of the adventure play parks having refreshed on cake and drinks at Fiona's house.

Country Kids of all ages at Coombe Mill 1

Once the zipwire was exhausted from the boys' efforts, we enjoyed a picnic on the green in front of our lodge next to the River Camel, before taking our scraps up to Dotty and Piglet. The poor things were fast asleep in their sty until I clanged the bucket at them and the promise of orange peel, bread rolls and egg shells was too great for them to stay dozing.

Following our own mini feed run, it was time to indulge in a spot of wood craft where we made our own stick rafts to sail down the river, and forest faces to adorn the trees of Coombe Mill before heading into the river to sail our rafts in a competition between Jenny and Mr. TBaM.

Country Kids of all ages at Coombe Mill 2

Once we'd retrieved the rafts from the river, it was time to explore the more shallow parts of the river and Coombe Mill's very own little island (in the stream). Both The Boy and Burton had a go on the rope swing hung from the tree, while we all enjoyed throwing pebbles and seeing how far they could go in the rapids!

A quick snack and shower saw all the boys dressed in clean and dry clothes with one more treat of a train ride before the Mummy Mishaps bunch had to head home. It was a marvellous day, thanks to our wonderful friends and the idyllic setting.

Country Kids of all ages at Coombe Mill 3

Jenny won by the way!

Days 209-215 of Project 365

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209-215 of 365

3rd August 2013 (Saturday) for web

209. This Is New (We went to Oxwich Bay with my brother and his family for the day. The Boy's aunty is an outdoor adventure instructor working in a variety of fields and she has been trained in 'beach school' education, so was keen to share her knowledge. We had an amazing day finding anemones, urchins, cockles, and crabs!)

210. Perspective (Off to Parc Play, one of our favourite places to go and far better than soft play! Wooden forts, zip wires, slides, sand pits, pirate ships; all outdoors or under cover. We were meeting up with a friend and her little boy who is a year older than The Boy. We haven't seen them in some time and it was interesting to see how The Boy, who was left behind physically last year, was capable of doing things that his friend couldn't. Well he could by the time we'd finished with him!)

211. Friendship (We visited Yeo Valley HQ in the Mendips today with a bunch of other bloggers to see how they are working with the Woodland Trust. It was great to meet up with Jenny and Burton again, and The Boy and he got straight up to mischief with a tempting pipe.)

212. Workspace (We've borrowed a tuff-spot and stand from the nursery at work for the Summer, definitely The Boy's new work space!)

213. David Bellamy (On Tuesday we did a leaf hunt at Yeo Valley and The Boy has been fascinated with finding different leaves ever since; he spotted the silver birch in our garden and ran to get the sheet to identify it.)

214. Focus (Today my special treat to myself arrived: a fixed focus 50mm lens for my dSLR. I have been quite sceptical about it, not really understanding what the difference would be between my 18-55mm and this. Now I get it! The depth of field is far more pronounced with this lens, as you can see from the photo above which was taken in our local nature reserve. We nipped down there to feed the swans and have lunch with my mum. I actually love this lens, and I adore this photo; it's going up on the wall.)

215. Heaven (And we're finally here! I wanted to leave home at 9am to travel down to Coombe Mill but a late night and sleepy heads this morning meant we left late. It took 3.5hrs to do the 2hrs down to Trago Mills, where we had good fun on the rides, steam train and shopping, and then a further 1.5 hours to get here. It then took thirty minutes to wait for our fish and chips before we could actually arrive at Coombe Mill. But oh my, it's all worth it!)

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Diving In! (Country Kids)

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As parents one of our jobs is to prevent our children from being afraid of the things we were; to prevent irrational fears.

I always enjoy going to the swimming pool, and I do like swimming, but I have a real fear of water in my face and I can't contemplate swimming underwater or even with the correct head position for front crawl. The minute water splashes up in my face, the fear kicks in that I'm not going to be able to breathe. And just as with every irrational fear, there is something that started it off. For me it was swimming with my dad when I was around eight years old, he left me on the side of the fairly shallowish water while he went and tried out the diving board and plunge pool (he's not the most responsible of people), but unfortunately the pool's wave machine was turned on during that five minutes and I lost my footing and went under. I remember every second vividly and I was petrified that I wouldn't be able to get up again. Obviously I did, but it was one of the scariest moments of my life and accounts for my claustrophobia and fear of putting my face in the water.

I don't want to pass this onto The Boy, and I try really hard to bite my tongue and assess the situation first before rushing forward to him. However sometimes I am aware that a little slips out, and there might be an occasional "let me wipe your face".

So going to a birthday party of a friend whose water confidence is first rate filled me both with terror and hope for The Boy's own confidence.

Diving In 1

You can see the difference between the two boys: one has been swimming once since last September due to chronic glue ear in both ears (and even then that was probably only his tenth trip, at a generous guess), and the other boy has been swimming since he was a tiny baby. One has a few drops of water in his face and is rubbing the water out of his eyes, one has water pouring down his face. I'm not criticising my boy, it's just a stark contrast in the ability levels of both boys of the same age.

The Boy happily stayed in the pool for around thirty minutes before getting out to play on the bouncy castle, or with swing ball (playing a leftie is the easiest way of playing this!), and soon wanted to get changed back into his clothes.

Then after dinner, and once all the other party guests had left, both boys returned to play in the garden. Burton quickly stripped down to his pants and went into the pool, The Boy took a further ten minutes before he followed suit.

And this is what happened…

Diving In 2

And then, after another hour or so, we end up with this:

Diving In 3

And then the final shred of evidence that he is becoming the swimmer I'd like him to be?

Diving In 4

We'll be going swimming this week!

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coombe mill

Learning for Life

Days 125-131 of Project 365

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125-131 of 365

125. Silhouette (Earlier in the day Mr. TBaM and I had sold at a car boot sale, and we followed that up with a trip across the barrage to the Bay for some very special celebrations. Today was the day that Cardiff celebrated its football club returning to the premiership, something it hasn't experienced for fifty years. There was a huge event down in Cardiff Bay with tens of thousands of supporters and proud Cardiffians alike. Secretly we were only after catching a glimpse of Alex from CBeebies who made The Boy very happy with a wave and a thumbs up! We then walked back across the barrage to watch the amazing fireworks.)

126. Crash! (Monday was a stunningly beautiful day. The buzz of lawnmowers, sizzle of barbeques, shrieks of laughter from children splashing in their paddling pools and the buzz of the honey bees filled the air. We entertained friends that we hadn't seen in four years; I was four months pregnant with The Boy when we last saw them. I was going to show a photo of The Boy watering the garden wearing an incredibly cute straw hat, however this one topped everything. He settled down to eat his cheese on toast, asked daddy for a cuddle and within thirty seconds he was asleep!)

127. Hide and Seek (The day was milder than it had been over the weekend but still sunny, especially late afternoon. We spent the morning trying to find some Summer shoes for The Boy, which is the reason it's rained on and off ever since! When Mr. TBaM got home from work, he and The Boy had a mad hour in the garden playing hide and seek.)

128. Choo choo! (A shorter than usual INSET today meant that I was able to get home and play with The Boy more than I usually can on a Wednesday. I made this super train track, with plenty of space for the station master to sit and command the rails.)

129. Zoom! (I set up a free painting session for The Boy to get to grips with after breakfast but he couldn't wait to get to grips with it! Car painting is the easiest painting around, minimum effort and maximum fun!)

130. Quack! (We got home at lunchtime after finishing school and nursery, only to find a pair of ducks on the drive. They've been around the neighbourhood for about a week or so, but are starting to wander into gardens now. I phoned the local nature reserve and was told that they're 'wild' ducks and unless hurt (in which case phone the RSPB) then leave them alone. Apparently in the mating season they often take themselves off in pairs for peace and quiet. We probably shouldn't have fed them, but I The Boy was worried they may be hungry.)

131. Pink Snow (We nipped into Cardiff for a review of Wetherspoon's new menu and parked near the Civic Centre, which has a beautiful park full of cherry trees. All were in full blossom and as The Boy ran through the park, the strong Spring wind showered him in pink blossom confetti.)

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Days 97-103 of Project 365

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97-103 of 365

 

97. Through the Semi-Circle Window! (The sun valiantly tried to shine for most of the afternoon and so we headed out to St. Fagan's Museum in north-west Cardiff. Back in November I bought an annual pass for the car park (museums in Wales are free) but we haven't been there since to get our money's worth. Now the weather is brightening up, we'll be there a lot more often. This time we explored the castle, but it's fair to say that once we've done that it will be a long time before we need to go back. Bit bland!)

98. By Torch-Light (We made a spectacular den in the living room (actually I did, Mr. TBaM is rubbish at them) and The Boy spent quite some time underneath reading his books by torchlight.)

99. Adoring Listener (We visited his cousins who we'd missed for several weeks due to us both being on holiday. He adores his cousins, and they are so good with him. Here he's watching and listening to his nine year old female cousin.)

100. Bath-time (Apologies for the bland photograph but today was back to work after three weeks off and I was shattered! A bathtime snap is all I could manage!)

101. Stretchy Squares (I bought The Boy a pegboard and eleastic bands and he's had great fun making shapes.)

102. Before The Big Day (Today we nipped into town to retrieve my much-missed Samsung Galaxy S3 which took a month to repair, as a result he missed his nap and was shattered at bedtime. Busy day tomorrow!)

103. Justin's House (We've just come in from an amazing day with Jenny from Mummy Mishaps and her lovely family. It was a great surprise for The Boy as I didn't tell him any of the plans until he saw Jenny pull onto the drive in her car. They came up for lunch, the three boys had a great play together and then we headed into Cardiff to see Justin's House.  He's been to a few shows before, mainly CBeebies, but this was his first larger production and he loved every second (apart from when Robert sucked up all the lights into his hoover). Afterwards we all went for a yummy dinner in Pizza Express!)

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Through The Hole (Flashback)

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I love bringing my son up in the town which I grew up in. Every experience he has is imprinted with the memories of my siblings, friends and I doing exactly the same thing, echoing the past, mirroring my actions, with a twenty or thirty year gap.

Our town has many parks, indeed it's known for it, and one of those parks has a plethora of play opportunities. Huge sweeping fir trees with gargantuan hiding spaces close to the tree trunk, woodland dells, Victorian pathways, aviaries with tweeting canaries, and overrun hedges.

In the small playground area, there is a hedge. It's an ancient hedge riddled with pathways which have been explored by children for generations.

And, as these photos of The Boy show from this Spring and the past two, it's a favourite with the next generation as well.

Through The Hole

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A Special Little Girl (For Matilda Mae)

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Last Summer I had the pleasure of holding a newborn baby. I'd known her mummy for two years and she had become a friend. Yes, an online friend, but a friend nonetheless. Before I met the little girl's mummy, I'd asked if I could have a cuddle from the baby and the mummy very happily agreed.

So at Britmums 2012 I had the pleasure of cuddling Jennie's youngest daughter, Matilda Mae. As I rubbed antibacterial handgel in my hands, I could feel a slight stirring. This was further compounded by the rush of affection and maternal instincts kicking in when I held Baby Tilda in my arms. I smelled her sweet, newborn smell, felt her little squiggliness and looked up at Jennie with tears stinging my eyes. She was the first baby that I'd held since The Boy was born. Suddenly all those desires for another child which had been quashed and locked away, rose up inside me and I knew without a shadow of a doubt that I wanted another baby.

That is the legacy that Matilda Mae has left me. Thanks to that beautiful baby girl and her very kind mummy, I've been getting help with my birth trauma from The Boy, and am making headway to extending our family.

The heartbreak that I feel from hearing about the sudden and unexplained death of Matilda a month ago, is nothing in comparison to how Jennie and her family feel. Yet I, and many other parent bloggers, feel connected to their loss.

Why?

Jennie asked me to write about why the parent blogging community has felt the loss of her life so strongly, this is being included in the funeral service.

Community and society evolve. In the 21st century where friends and family are separated by great distances, methods of communication have had to change for relationships to survive. Yet with this world of sending 'instant' messages virtually, time differences and busy lives create yet another obstacle, another barrier to feeling connected. Barriers which, to a new mother, can feel just as isolating as the geographical separation.

As a new mother, I discovered the 'world' of twitter, and in turn the online parent community. It's hard to explain how a group of people can find solice, comfort and friendship via the Internet, but they can. In the same way our parents' and grandparents' generations could be more open through a letter to a penpal, so can parents today. Friendships are struck up through real-time discussions on twitter; lives, hopes and dreams are explored through blogs. No-one judges or condemns; we are all parents, we are all people with feelings, and we are an army of moral support in each other's pockets. There is always someone there.

The parent blogging community is a special one; to show empathy, caring and compassion for a 'stranger' is humbling and restores my faith in humanity.

Most of us start blogs as a way of recording everyday life or verbalising our anxieties. We never dream that people are reading, enjoying, empathising; yet all too soon we find words of comfort and advice, experiences shared and solutions offered. Edspire is a blog that is full of a mother's love for her determined and amazing twins, and her miracle baby, Matilda. Jennie writes with such heartfelt emotion, sharing her innermost thoughts, fears and hopes and inviting the reader to be part of her life. I've followed the wedding story and the secret that was Matilda when vows were exchanged, felt the joy of a natural birth, the anguish of losing her prematurely.

Through blogs we see each other's relationships develop, marriages happen, babies be born and grow. We feel the pride when they sit for the first time, we feel the tiredness due to a night spent nursing a teething baby, and we feel the grief when one of ours is lost. Some of use will never meet in person (I am lucky enough to have met Jennie and to have held Matilda), but it does not diminish our bond.

Shine brightly Matilda Mae

(02.05.2012 – 02.02.2013)

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