Listography: Top Five Mugs

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I like Kate a lot. I think she's a little bit bananas and that's something I like in a mum and blogger. Sometimes her Listography themes are a little out there, but generally they work for me. My only problem is that I don't always have time to post before she shuts the linky. This week though, she's excelled herself:

Mugs

By anyone's benchmark, that's a little bizarre. However, as I read her post and scoffed to myself, I found myself visualising my favourite mugs in the cupboard and realising that she's right: I have favourite mugs that I used for specific things. And so, because I haven't done it in a while, I'm joining in with the Listography, but I will have you know that I consider this as ludicrous as when I posted a photo of the inside of my fridge.

Bought for me by my dad when I started teaching. To me, this is the only time he has ever indicated that he is proud of the job that I do. This is used for my cold coffees, normally in the afternoon when I need an extra strong and cold frappucino. I was furious with my husband when he chipped it.

Also an excellent mug for cold coffees, especially if I'm putting whipped cream and caramel drizzle on the top. Given to me by an ex-pupil, I was cross when Mr. TheBoyandMe chipped this one too!

My sister gave me this, nearly twenty years ago, so heaven help Mr. TBaM if he chips this one! Excellent for cold milk first thing in the morning.

Quite frankly, he chips this one, then he can move out now! Handwash only due to the gold edging, this was a present from the private school I went to, on their big 110 year anniversary.

This is the original twitter mug, anyone else who has made one since is merely in NameArt's shadow. I love my twitter addict mug, had it for a year but can't use it very often as I don't want my family to know my twitter name!

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Listography: Top Five Tips For Bloggers

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The fabulous KateTakes5 has come up with a cracking theme this week for her listography!

1. Use the same name on your blog as all your social media platforms.

Building up an identity is essential to helping people remember you easily. I follow several people on twitter who use a completely unrelated nickname to that of their blog, and then have a Facebook account that uses their real name. It's really difficult to remember all three, especially if they have obscure spellings. If you want people to find you easily then use the same name for all platforms, make it easy to spell, different to others (there's a lot of 'mummy' names out there) and preferably under ten characters long (saves space on twitter for conversation within 140 characters). And yes I know my name is eleven characters long, but there you go! Do as I say, not as I do.

2. If you want comments, make it easy for your readers.

Don't use word verification like captcha, etc. It is a big, fat inconvenience for your readers. If you are on blogspot, they'll probably give up halfway through because it is a ridiculous process to comment: write comment, fill in details, press publish, enter word verification, press submit, press publish again. It's not encouraging is it? Install Disqus and your readers will love you forever. If you don't have word verification and don't want to use Disqus, then enable the name/url option for commenting, self-hosted blog-owners will appreciate the effort.

And while we're discussing commenting; if you want comments, then you need to comment on other blogs. It's a two-way street!

3. Consider going self-hosted for more freedom

This depends entirely upon your reason for blogging, and the range of subjects that you blog about. I started blogging on 5th December 2010 and within a month had started the 365 photography project. I quickly realised that I wanted the posts on a separate page to my written content, but wordpress.com doesn't allow for separate posts to be made to any page other than the home-page. It was pointed out to me that by photograph 150, it was going to be difficult to find the comment box, and to know which photo each comment related to. By mid-January 2011, I'd transferred to wordpress.org which is self-hosted. It allows me to set up categories/pages and post to them separately, with individual posts and individual comment boxes per post. I hope it's easier for my readers, because it certainly is for me!

4. Subject matters!

Ha, like the pun? Please don't make me explain it to you!

In all seriousness, your blog is for you, yes. However, I strongly disagree with anyone who says that they only blog for themselves, and have had several discussions about this. If the only person that you wanted to read it was yourself, then why not keep a diary? Or make your blog password protected if just for family? The minute you press publish, then you are opening your thoughts up for anyone in the world to read. To think otherwise is naive (meant without offense).

Therefore, think really carefully about what you put on your blog. If you don't want someone to find you, blog anonymously. If you don't want to be open to criticism, then don't post controversial content. If you want your child to still talk to you when he or she is twenty, then don't post that photo of them naked in the garden. If you don't want your child to be the subject of ridicule in the playground, then don't divulge about his problems wetting the bed. If you don't want your in-laws to know about something going on in your life, then don't press publish.

5. Engage with your readers

Use twitter and become a part of the blogging community. I was using twitter before I started blogging, and I thoroughly blame MammyWoo and The Moiderer for getting me into blogging in the first place. They are two of the first 'real' people that I started following, apart from my husband. If you install a 'Follow me on twitter' button in the sidebar of your blog, then it will make it a damn sight easier for people to know who you are and 'talk' to you in 'real' life.

Another way of engaging is to install a plugin which enables your comment replies to be e-mailed directly to your readers. I saw GeekMummy had this and copied her. I've been told that it was a pleasant surprise to have my reply e-mailed across, and it opens up a dialogue and will encourage return visits.

And because it's my blog and I can, I've done another one!

6. Enjoy it!

It's a competitive world out there, full of stats and rankings. It's incredibly easy to get upset if you've found that you've dropped in the rankings, or haven't been invited to a major PR event in London that the world and his wife is going to, but don't. In all reality, could you make it to London for an event that lasted only an hour? Would you want to? Will the drop in rankings stop you from blogging? When you rise, someone else falls and think how that makes them feel. When I climbed 200 places in the Tots100 and made it into the actual 100, I was overwhelmed and overjoyed. Until I found out that one of my real-life friends had fallen 150 places. Swings and roundabouts see?

Do you have any more to add to the list?

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Listography: Top Five Random Things I Like

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I've been rubbish recently with the Listography but I really wanted to make an effort to do this week's theme of randomness.

Just one word of warning though – random is not 'I like chocolate' – that's just not going to cut it round here. However 'I like chocolate sauce with my chips' is getting a bit warmer.

  1. Pub chips must be eaten with mayonnaise. End of.
  2. When I am in the classroom, the groups of tables must be parallel or perpendicular to the walls.
  3. I like to eat my custard slices by squeezing the pieces together, licking the custard out around the side and then eating the 'sandwich'.
  4. David Tennant was the best Doctor Who ever. Matt Smith is rubbish.
  5. I like a jam sandwich and half a glass of milk every night before I go to bed every night.

I know, possibly not as random as some but hey-ho!

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Listography: Top Five Searches

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The inimitable KateTakes5 has set us the challenge of revealing the top five searches on our blog.

Some people have exciting results like "surfing on jelly" or "nakes bananas". I don't. On WordPress, I have three variations of my blog name and twelve variations for a cosmetic review I did. Oh and an ostrich.

I'm going to check Google Analytics instead…

They're just as bad!

I'm going to sift through the review referrals and pick out the next five that are about content instead.

  1. Learning Through Play: this makes me happy as it's one of the things that I'd like my blog associated with.
  2. Composterium: and now it's going through my head again! Thank you Mr. Bloom!
  3. We Went To The Animal Fayre: ah, that was a good weekend.
  4. Helen Jessup: I kid you not.
  5. I Need a Wee-Wee: ah, famous for my potty-training posts.

I can't believe number four…
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Listography: Guilty Pleasures

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It's been weeks since I've taken part in my one of my three favourite linkies, many apologies to the gorgeous KateTakes5. However, I can't let this one past: Guilty Pleasures.

  • Home and Away

Aside from a few random episodes a month or so ago, I've not seen this in well over six months, possibly even a year! For me it just hasn't been the same since the departure of this chap:

And no, before hubby looks at me and says "I always knew it!", it was not just about his cheeky grin and pecs but because he was funny, could act and actually brought some life to the programme. However, I may have to turn back on and enjoy the mannerisms of Alf and Marilyn soon, I need a little Summer Bay in my life.

  • Arctic Roll

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, it's gorgeous! Simple as!

  • Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Absolutely brilliant, at it's peak with Spike (phwoargh). Specifically the episode where everyone forgets who they are and he comes out with a torrent of typically 'English' swear words, and 'Once More With Feeling'.

  • Naff middle-of-the-road pop songs from the 90s

Let Loose "Crazy for You" and Steps were my all time favourites. Have both CDs and still listen to them. Don't care, deal with it.

  • Gossip Girl

Think what you will of me but it's bloody brilliant. If I was 14 years younger you wouldn't think so badly of me for fancying Chuck Bass, but he is a God and makes that programme amazing. Without him and Blair's on-again, off-again relationship, it would be just a Serena Van Der Woodsen fashion show!

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Listography: Top Five Bands I'd Like To See Live

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The lovely Listographer extraordinaire that is KateTakes5 is currently being a rock-chick in Sunny Spain and has therefore set us the challenge of:

Top Five Bands I'd Like To See Live.

Unfortunately, I am nowhere near as the cool cat that is Kate, and my musical preferences lie more firmly in the middle of the road. I've been to some great gigs (nope, not cool enough) concerts, nearly all well before The Boy. Robbie Williams just before he hit the commercial bigtime, when his angst-ridden performance of No Regrets involved the images of the 'TT' symbol burning on a projector in the background and a gravestone featuring the symbol were not to be forgotten. Not least of all because he was supported by the marvellous Divine Comedy, who then actually joined him on stage for their bit. Oh, and he rode around the stage on a motorised toilet. Texas was great, Stereophonics made me embrace my inner rock-chick temporarily, although one of the best was Catatonia in Margam Park, supported and accompanied by a Welsh male voice choir. I stood in the mud in my leather coat and alternated between feeling a) thoroughly 'with it' and b) worried for the state of my boots.

Without further ado:

  • Take That

Never saw them first time around, although I spent plenty of time watching the videos of their concerts. A few of the tapes may have worn through where my friend and I rewound a few bits. Especially the bit where Gary performed Smells like Teen Spirit bare-chested in leather jeans. I couldn't see the Circus tour as The Boy had been born 3 weeks before and for some reason hubby wouldn't let me go. This tour I chose not to go because I felt I couldn't justify the cost. If they do another tour, sod the cost; I'm going!

  • Kaiser Chiefs

I've seen Keane and they were brilliant, but the Kaiser Chiefs would feature more hilarity and less pompousness. Are they even still around?

  • Queen

I know I'm only 33, but wouldn't they be excellent? Can you imagine the buzz from the crowd when they started singing Radio GaGa? I've seen clips of LiveAid and Mr. Mercury worked that crowd for all he was worth. I bet they'd have been amazing live. Anyone got a time machine?

  • George Michael

I have always maintained that this is my utmost got-to see artist. Only I think he's had a farewell tour now? Mind you, he could be like Cher who has been having a farewell tour since 147BC, in which case I might still get to see him! But he'd have to lose the attitude, and quite possibly perform Club Tropicana or I wouldn't be interested.

  • Michael Jackson

I know I need another time machine for this one, but surely this is the one man that all the others emulate? How can the meek and mild near-skeleton of a man turn into that complete giant who oozed testosterone at every crotch-grabbing, finger-snapping, moon-walking move? Justin Timberlake can try, Justin Bieber can stop trying to dream it because Michael Jackson was one of the most amazing dancers, and therefore stage performers ever.

Who else is up for a little gravity-defying dance with me?

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Listography: Five Things I Want To Do This Summer

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Kate's a bit busy this week setting up the marvellous Parent Blogger Network on Netmums, so our apprentice Listographer extraordinaire Keith is hosting the Listography for her. Not content with running such a tight-ship as he does, he has decided to set himself five challenges for the Summer holidays with his children.

I have been counting down the days 'til the Summer holidays start since Easter. It's now only three more weeks to go (or six days in school, one on a course and one as INSET. See told you I'd been counting them down. Do you want it in minutes?) until I get to have six fantabulous weeks with my gorgeous bundle of mischief and I can't wait. We have a few necessary items to do and some fun things as well.

Here goes:

  • Potty-train The Boy.

I know! I'm a bit worried about this, and also thinking 'ewww' a lot. Guess I'm going to be getting very familiar with poo over the next few months hey?

  • Tidy the spare bedroom.

It is an abyss of detritus. I now open the door, stand in the two square foot that are clear because the door pushes the stuff out of the way, and sigh. Then I close the door and declare to hubby that we need to tidy it soon. It is horrendous. There is a computer in the corner that we don't use anymore because we have the laptop. It's only use is as a print server and storage device for some photos. There is a bed-settee covered in The Boy's outgrown clothes that need to be boxed and put in the attic. A step-machine and abdominal roll doo-dah, both pointless and serving as a clothes rail at the moment. Countless cardboard boxes that are either from The Boy's toys (keep the boxes, the toys sell for more at a nearly new sale in the original packaging!) or from review items (they might come in useful!) and jiffy bags. Plus a gigantic wooden bowl that's about three foot across which my dad made, but now I have a baby it is impractical to keep on the dining table or it gets covered in playdough, paint and Dairylea. The room needs sorting out for God's sake!

  • Make a start on losing some weight.

I'm contemplating the possibility of a sibling for The Boy at some point. I was fortunate not to gain any weight (at all!) with The Boy, but I can't be so certain next time around. I want four stone gone by November 24th (my 10th wedding anniversay). Or else!

  • Family Time

I do not want the weeks to whizz by and not have done anything in them. Weekends will be spent doing things as a family unit. Week days will hopefully be filled with socialisation (for him and me), craft activities and playing in the garden.

  • Retrain our sleep habits

We are rubbish at going to bed before midnight and our son wakes up at half past six. It is impossible to survive on that, it needs to stop now! Along with this, we need to get The Boy off the habit of being cuddled to sleep. I think I've built it up into a bigger thing than it is, but he will learn how to go down by himself. Won't he?

Listography: Inventions

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The Listographer extrodinaire has given us what she feels is a simple theme this week:

This weeks theme is Inventions, or if you will Inventions that-would-make-my-life-easier.

And she's right it's not as difficult as you'd initially think! I will say one thing though; I'm pinching back my Money Tree idea that she has 'borrowed'.

  1. A food replicator: I know it sounds bizarre doesn't it? However, ever since I was a Trekkie as a teenage (ST:TNG if you please), I have been fascinated with the replicators. Imagine this, you've walked in from a really hard day in work and do not have the energy to cook from frozen, let alone fresh. In fact, you've forgotten to do the shopping so there's nothing in the freezer anyway! Walk to the hole in the wall, speak into it and within 30 seconds it has replicated the exact meal that you have placed an order for, even down to the parmesan shavings on the top. Blame Picard for this one: "Tea, Earl Grey, Hot!"
  2. A universal translator: Imagine if we could understand not only foreign languages, but what our toddlers or babies were trying to tell us. Better still, we could get the husbands to use them so they understood what we were actually going on about!
  3. Hover skateboard: I'm stealing this idea from Back to the Future 2 here, but how cool would that be? It wouldn't make my life easier, apart from nipping around the playground in order to get to those naughty boys quicker, but it would be cooler than a cool thing!
  4. An automatically weeding flowerbed: I find it boring, stressful, difficult, tiring, awkward and painful to weed the flower beds. Yet I like having a tidy and pretty garden! I would like to be able to press a button and have everything weed-free and the lawn mown.
  5. A Money Tree: It was my idea first! Ha! As I said back then "Those who say 'money doesn't buy happiness' have clearly been in the position to experience it! I am not asking for a ridiculous amount of money, but enough so that I don't have to work. Oh and possibly so we can have a porch and a conservatory". Well we have a porch now, courtesy of my mum lending us the money, but I'd still like to have just enough to not have to work, a pretty little tree in the garden would be so convenient!

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Listography: Top 5 Places I'd Like To Visit

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The marvel and wit that is KateTakes5 has decreed that this week's Listography is places we'd like to visit.

I'm quite a homebird and don't like to spend weeks and weeks away from the little haven that is my three-bedroom, semi-detached suburban cocoon. Before The Boy we would have two breaks throughout the year, all just a long weekend normally in an European city. Some we revisited, like Prague and Barcelona, because when I find somewhere I like, I like to go back and explore more. However, I've always maintained that I will not take an infant abroad because I personally could not stand the stress it puts on them, you and every other person in the vicinity. That's me trying to have an easy life. It does however mean that I have deprived myself of feeling the sun on my skin for the forseeable future.

There are five places that I'd like to visit though before I'm too old and wrinkly to appreciate them:

1) The Greek Islands

We very nearly made it there. In the August before I fell pregnant with The Boy we started planning our October half-term holiday. I really wanted to go to the Greek Islands but was put off by the whole loo-paper in bin debacle. I decided that we'd probably do it through a cruise instead which would mean a) we'd see more of the islands, and b) I could flush my bog-paper! Finances meant that we'd have to put that off 'til the following year so we looked at Menorca instead. And then I fell pregnant so we stayed home and bought a car-seat and nappies instead!

2) The Galapagos Islands

I want to see the turtles lumbering around in their natural and protected environment. I want to see what made Charles Darwin think 'hang on a minute…' and I wouldn't mind enjoying the beaches either!

3) Alaska

Blame Northern Exposure!

4) Petra

I have inherited my dad's fascination with the place and it has nothing to do with Indiana Jones. I find the whole place completely astounding, a true Wonder of the World. To walk through that passage and see temples carved out of stone must be breathtaking.

5) The River Nile

This is somewhere that I've wanted to go for years and years! This one is completely down to Agatha Christie and Peter Ustinov, the glamour of the cruise-boats is amazing. So one day we will cruise 'up' the Nile from South to North (how bizarre?) enjoying the temples of Abu Simble and, of course, the Pyramids at Giza.

One day.

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Top Five Finals

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This week Kate literally Takes Five, while Keith takes over. Chronicles of a Reluctant Housedad (one of my favourite recent finds) is caretaking the Listography this week and has launched onto the scene with a cracker:Top Five Finals.

His own Listography sets the scene of his finale moments inspired by the recent non-event that was 'The Rapture'. A few others have also shared their final five things they'd do before kicking the bucket but I'm going for something different.

I'm a little bit fiery in temperament. I like to blame it on being a Leo, using Astrology as a get-out-of-jail-free card works with some people. However in reality, it's because I'm short-tempered. So this is my:

Top Five Final Straws

1) There is nothing more likely to make the kettle boil than insolence. Specifically answering back. In school I remain as cool as a cucumber while inwardly I am strangling the little blighter. They get the raised eyebrow and lose their break-time.
2) Eye-rolling. Very much linked to the last one. If you want me to gouge your eyes out, that is the way to ensure it happens. Although I am unlikely to because it is a) icky and b) illegal.
3) Parking in the wrong space. Are you disabled? Are you?! No? THEN MOVE! I'm sorry but do you have an infant with you? What do you mean there were no spaces left in the disabled bays!! Teenagers do not count as children in this case! And while I'm at it: if you leave your children in the car with your partner and they are not getting out of the vehicle, then you don't need the space!
4) If you want me to move my trolley so that you can get your natural, live Greek yoghurt with pre and probiotics then say the magic words "excuse me please". Otherwise I will not move! And I will say something to you if you roll your eyes at my husband behind his back you ignorant woman! (Yes this happened earlier in Tesco's, she was virtually climbing on his back she was leaning so close).

However all of these things mean that I must not allow myself to lose my temper. I am a 30 something mother who needs to set a good example to The Boy. But most of all because the last time it was the final straw…

5) I threw a cheap Ikea glass across the kitchen floor. It bounced across the ceramic tiles breaking four of them and came to a rest against the fridge. Undamaged.

This has been brought to you by a woman on the edge following a shopping trip to Tesco's on a Bank Holiday Sunday.

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