listography | TheBoyandMe

5 Ingredients to My Perfect Day

February 20, 2011 by TheBoyAndMe 14 Comments

After having a terrible week with an ill household, Kate had been dreaming of a day without digital thermometers and sweaty dressing gowns, and therefore has come up with another corker!

What makes a perfect day? Many of the ingredients were present when we were just a couple, but are dim and distant memories now. Some of them would be boring without my little shadow to oversee the events. The first three are entirely possible if we get a decent summer! A girl can dream can't she?

A lie-in: I am certain that many of us would choose this, but as parents to young children it's allowed! I'd ideally like The Boy to wake up at 8.30, chatter away to himself and then happily call us over the monitor. He'd patiently wait while we saunter in to see his happy, smiling face.
A scrummy breakfast: Continental, buffet-style would be my choice here. Sat on the patio under the umbrella with the sun shining down from a brilliant blue sky and the water-feature trickling in the background.
The Beach: Pop everyone into the car with all necessary equipment for fun in the sun and drive down to Rhossili on the Gower. Have a generally marvellous lunchtime and afternoon building sandcastles, splashing in the sea, flying kites, not getting sunburnt and no sand in any crevices please.
Italian: Clicking the ruby slippers together and popping over to our favourite restaurant in Reading which no longer exists: Mia Beni. I would like the Tagliatelle Fiorentino (this version was cream, spinach and blue cheese), followed by coconut sorbet, and a rather stunningly gorgeous Chianti to accompany. The Boy would have been escorted home by nana, who also had ruby slippers by the way.
The Theatre: click again and off to the Haymarket to view the wonder of Christine and Raoul's devotion thwarted by the evil, but desperately lonely Phantom. Final click of the ruby slippers and home to bed with a night that sees The Boy sleeping through without any teething pain.

Please?

Yes I have the song going through my head, but the Children in Need version not the Lou Reed version.

Top Five Favourite Films

February 15, 2011 by TheBoyAndMe 16 Comments

I love films. Always have done. Memories of rainy Sunday afternoons watching black and white classics on our old wood-effect Bush television have pervaded my memory while contemplating this topic. You know the ones, they star a dashing gentleman in a dapper suit, possibly with a very neat moustache, probably clean-shaven with perfect bryl-creemed hair. Think David Niven, Clark Gable or Dirk Bogarde (yes him, not Humphrey Bogart, I know who I mean). Their leading ladies wearing simple silk gowns, possibly a wrap-around design with shoulder-pads to die for, or maybe a flared waistline and a sweetheart neckline, with luxuriously wavy Rita Hayworth hair. Or of course, my favourite leading lady of all time: Miss. Hepburn, Audrey not Katharine please.

As you can see, my taste in films is diverse. I debated doing a post with two Top Five's; one classic and one modern. However, I decided that might be pushing the boundaries a little so I have gone with modern favourites. Although interestingly, none of my chosen films are from the noughties. There are plenty that I like, but maybe they haven't been repeated enough on BBC and ITV for me to recognise them as favourites yet.

So here we go:

1) Footloose

It's classic and I love it. I can picture every single second of the film in glorious '80s technicolour. From the amazing dance/acrobatic routine in the warehouse, full of teenage angst, to the thought-provoking debate in the council meeting where Ren dares to challenge the town to change its no-music rule ably assisted by a fabulous and under-stated Dianne Wiest. I chuckle every time I see him try and teach Willard how to dance, and at the finale, my feet and hear cannot keep still. Love it!

2) Grosse Point Blank

The vast majority of John Cusack films are brilliant. I won't mention that daft 'Being John Malkovich' one. Some he's kinda sold-out on, everyone has to pay the mortgage, but GPB is classic Mr. Cusack. I debated High Fidelity, but prefer this one. It's funny, romantic, clever, stupid and, quite frankly, kick-arse. I can even tolerate the Driver woman in it.

3) Demolition Man

I do love a good Sandra Bullock film, but this is not what I like this one. Sylvester Stallone is actually really good in it, not at all wooden. It's my type of action film: funny baddies who aren't too gruesome with a strong-willed heroine. The writing is hilarious, and I think the bit I like the best is the references to the future. Taco-bell, toilet paper (!) and Arnie's political career. I bet they didn't predict that one coming true!

4) The Fifth Element

Bruce Willis' best film in my opinion. Milla Jovovich is brilliant in it; her portrayal of Lee-Loo's innocence and discovery of human-life is so endearing. The scene where she wipes the floor clean with those aliens, intermingled with aria is fantastic cinematography. Gary Oldman is just the right type of evil. "Moolti-pass"!

5) The Breakfast Club

As far as I am concerned this is my favourite Brat-pack film because it doesn't have the predictable members in it. The story of five teenagers in detention on a Saturday morning is so relatable (not that I ever had a detention, I was a good girl). All different, yet all the same underneath; the cool guy (phwoargh by the way), the geek, the jock, the pretty girl and the emo. A voyage of discovery and clubbing together to overcome the evil teacher who enjoys ridiculing them each in turn. Ally Sheedy is genius in this film.

(Hubby is going to kick himself because he's only been able to predict two of these five!)

However, because it's my blog and I can do this, I would also like to add the following film as a favourite, thereby making this my Top Six:

6) My Fair Lady

"I could have danced all night, I could have danced all night, and still come back for more!" "Move, your blooming arse!" "Without you twirling it the Earth can spin…" I love the bickering, the retorts, Eliza's development and the way she brings the Professor down to reality with a bump. Cecil Beaton's costumes are amazing, the original black and white ball. Right, where's my DVD of it?

Things I'd Love This Valentine's Day

February 7, 2011 by TheBoyAndMe 15 Comments

The ever wise KateTakes5 has declared that love is in the air for this week's Listography. If it is, I'm opening the window and investing in some air freshener, can't be doing with any of that nonsense!

I've read various blogs recently about romance, partners and love. Prior to The Boy, not once did I realise how much relationships change when offspring arrive. My mother has always maintained that for the first year of their life, it's about them. After that, they fit into your family lifestyle and routine. I'd agree with that, but for the fact that I don't remember what our routine or lifestyle was like before the arrival of The Boy. I think there probably was a lot more romance, but that's easy when there's no bottles to wash up, toys to tidy and sleep is not broken by "mummy, daddy, up-py" at 3.37am. It's a bit hard to look adoringly into each other's eyes when The Boy pushes daddy away from mummy if we even contemplate a hug.

Nevertheless, this list is a wish list; I know hubby loves me, but we do not have the finances for it. Therefore:

1) A money tree

Go on, call me shallow. Those who say 'money doesn't buy happiness' have clearly been in the position to experience it! I am not asking for a ridiculous amount of money, but enough so that I don't have to work. Oh and possibly so we can have a porch and a conservatory. Thanks!

2) A Links of London bracelet

Isn't it pretty?! I've bought the imitation one from the chemist and it just looks nothing like it. Pitying glances have resulted in it being passed onto my niece for dress-up. Oh but a real one would be divine.

3) White chocolate truffles

Achievable and realistic. I'm quite fond of the Italian ones from Marks and Spencer, do they still make them? Otherwise they sell them in Thorntons. Who am I kidding? I'd be happy with the ones from Lidl.

4) Another four hours in the day

I wouldn't need a personal assistant/ironing lady/cleaner/gardener if I had another four hours. Maybe five. I'd dedicated two of them to sleep and the other time could be used to sort out the towering inferno of paperwork resting on the recipe books in the kitchen. But then of course, that money tree would mean that I could give up work and have that time. Do they sell them in B&Q?

5) …

… no words, sigh!

Most Annoying Children’s T.V. Programmes

February 1, 2011 by TheBoyAndMe 14 Comments

KateTakes5 has come up with a very interesting topic this week. I was quite anal for the first year and didn't let The Boy watch any television, with the exception of the very occasional '3rd and Bird' episode. The box may have been on in the background with my daily fix of Phil and Holly, but no children's programmes. I know, cruel hey? I also didn't let him have any sugar, salt or processed food until 1yr old either. How times have changed…

I am rather controlling in what I let him watch. My fantastic mum looks after him while I'm working and I was getting a bit fed up of coming home, turning on the television and finding certain channels on. No I don't mean dodgy ones, I'm talking the American channels (I know that seems Xenophobic but it is not. My child is British, I want him to grow up with a British accent not one learnt from the Disney Channel). In my head is that advert from a few years ago: The Wombles with an American accent. Therefore having asked her not to have Cartoonito or the Disney channel on a million times, but still finding them in use I blocked them on sky+. Yes, I used the parental controls on my mother!

Basically this list is easy for me, anything that's not on CBeebies or BabyTV is pretty much a no-no. There are some decent programmes on Nick Jnr as well. Snob I know, but I may as well get my money's worth from my licence fee. However I can identify these programmes as irritating the hell out of me, and yes some of them are on my beloved CBeebies.

1) Barney. He is a big purple dinosaur. He looks nothing like a dinosaur and they weren't purple. I don't care that he teaches the children about being kind and sharing, he's a purple dinosaur! The child actors on it are sickly sweet and schmaltzy and they do my head in. No! Not in this household.

2) LazyTown. The rubber masks are slightly alarming aren't they? They look like the Dead Presidents about to rob a bank. And it's not very realistic: Stephanie is actually about 22 and The Boy would have no concept that Robbie Rotten is naughty so why subject him to it?

3) Gigglebiz. Justin Fletcher may well have an MBE and it is well deserved. I think that every mother should be given a voucher to use that entitles them to 3hrs of childcare courtesy of Mr. Tumble to be redeemed in person in extreme cases of tiredness. The man is a genius and 'Something Special' is a firm favourite in this house with all of us. However 'Gigglebiz' is not funny: as I see it, it's a cross between 'Little Britain' and 'Benny Hill', both of which leave me reaching for the remote control. I think he's tried to indulge his love of slapstick and enforced it on children. No thank you.

4) Teletubbies. I actually like the programme and so does The Boy, but he gets really upset and cries when they disappear over the hills. I can't allow my child to develop separation anxiety for a red creature with a flipping circle on its head and a television in its stomach! So it stays off for the moment.

5) Spongebob Squarepants. I don't get it. That's all I have to say on the matter.

While I'm at it, remember this advert?

Things I wish I could do

January 24, 2011 by TheBoyAndMe 11 Comments

A though-provoking one from @katetakes5 this week, welcome back!

1) Play the piano

I'm not very good at music; I was kicked out of recorder club in primary school, and only managed to stay in guitar club because I knew the words. However, you've got to have innate talent to play those haven't you? Blow a woodwind instrument wrongly and it's shrill. Pluck/strum/whatever you do with a bow a stringed instrument the wrong way & it sounds like a cat being ravaged on a Saturday night. But a piano is different: as long as it's in tune, that's the note it makes, you can't hit the key in the wrong way! (This is what I am telling myself, do not argue with me) I've even got a piano! The infant school were getting rid of theirs a few years ago so I bought it for £100. It's sat in my dining room for 6 years now, lovingly sanded back and re-oiled. The Boy will probably learn to play it before me!

2) Lose weight

I'm rubbish, I really am! I can do it, I just can't be arsed bothered. Well I have * stones to lose to be back to my wedding weight, and with our 10th wedding anniversary in November, I'd like to do it. Plus I want another child so need to be more fit; I'll be older, it will be harder.

3) Keep my temper

I'm a Leo (not whatever that stupid new zodiac says). "The Leo type is … ambitious, courageous, dominant, strong willed, positive, independent, self-confident there is no such a word as doubt in their vocabularies, and they are self-controlled (?)." Strong-willed? Really? No, I'd never have guessed! I am learning self-control and am better with age, and with being a mother, but it's still something I have to work on. Lots! It does go on to say "A Leonian can … display … excessive hastiness of temper." So that's alright then, I'm excused!

4) Keep my mouth shut

Sometimes, just sometimes, I find myself uttering a put-down or retorting to someone. It tends to be when there is a massive lack of manners being displayed by someone who really should know better. Things/people that wind me up (and I tend to find myself saying something):

people not holding the door open for someone. Likewise someone not saying 'thank you' when I've held the door open for them. Yes I am that person who says "Thank you so much, oh no not a problem at all you're welcome" very loudly so they can hear me!
teenagers playing football outside my house. I have marched out the house several times and had stand-up rows with them. One of these days there's going to be a news report of them having done me in!

5) Win the National Lottery

I'm not greedy, I don't want six numbers all to myself. I'd be happy to share it, or have five numbers and a bonus ball. £100,000 would change our lives. And yes, I am in it, otherwise I can't win it!