Getting Your Baby Back to Sleep During The Night (Guest Post)

Is your Baby Not Sleeping? Here are five practical tips for a good night's sleep.

How your baby sleeps through the night is something of a lottery. While some babies quickly slip into a routine, others can struggle to adjust to the cycle of night and day. Most babies wake up at least once through the night for a feed, and they will gradually develop their own pattern of sleeping. There is no right or wrong approach to getting your baby to sleep every night, but there are a few methods you can use to help things along a little.

Get Your Baby Used to Day and Night Quickly

It is usually a good idea to get your baby into a day and night routine from the outset. Creating a relaxing environment at night will foster an environment conducive to sleep, and you can do this by keeping the lights low, changing the tone of your voice, removing any distractions and putting your baby down as soon as she has been changed and fed. It is also a good idea to choose a bedtime that suits your routine – and stick to it.

Choose the Right Place for Sleep

The NHS recommends that your baby should sleep in the same room as you for the first six months of her life. The room your baby sleeps in should be quiet and well ventilated, so consider switching rooms to give your baby the best sleeping environment possible. Try putting your baby down to sleep in a basket or cot (whatever works best for you both) just before she nods off, as this will get her used to falling asleep on her own. A lot of newborns will fall asleep in the arms of their parent during the last feed of the day, and there is nothing wrong with this at first. However, you probably don't want your baby to rely on this personal contact in the long run.

Establish a Bedtime Routine

Babies usually respond well to a flexible routine of feeding and sleeping, and the sooner you can start one, the sooner your baby's body clock will sync with day and night. Exactly what your routine looks like is something you will have to discover yourself, but it can include a bath, a fresh set of clothes, a last feed and maybe some soothing words from you or your partner. It is also a good idea to reduce stimuli to a minimum during the two or three hours before your baby's bedtime. You will need to ensure that the ambient temperature is just right, as babies are very sensitive to both hot and cold rooms – something that increases the chances of them waking unnecessarily through the night.

It is only natural to be wary of even the slightest murmur from your newborn baby during the night, but wherever possible, you should try to resist the temptation to check on her. In many cases, she will simply move around and go straight back to sleep. However, if she starts to cry, there is no escaping the fact that she probably needs feeding. Night feeds should be extremely quiet, no-nonsense affairs. Resist the urge to talk to your baby, and feed her with the minimum of fuss before burping her and putting her straight back down. However, first check that she doesn't need changing, as a soiled nappy could prevent her from settling straight away. It may be worth investing in some low-level lighting for night feeds, as it will help to keep your baby sleepy and relaxed.

Dealing with disturbed sleep can be tough during the first few weeks of parenthood, so try to share the burden with your partner, close friends and family. In some cases, relatively simple changes to your routine can work wonders – something you can ask a private midwife about at the local children's hospital. Remember, broken sleep is an inevitable part of parenthood, but there are ways to make things easier on both you and your baby.

This is a guest post.

Christy's Bedlinen (Review)

Like most parents who don't seem to spend anywhere near enough time enjoying sleep, I am fond of my bed; it's like an old friend who I don't catch up with often enough.

I'm also a bit fussy with the bedlinen that I have, I like the soft and easy iron aspect of poly-cotton (even though I know it's not really an approved of or trendy fabric) and I don't like printed materials, so the design has to be woven. I also like cream or neutral colours so that it doesn't alarm me when I wake up in the middle of the night to tend to The Boy. Finding decent bedlinen can be a bit of a nightmare at times.

Therefore when I was recently sent some gorgeous bedding from Christy, I couldn't wait to get it on the bed.

Christy's bedlinen

The Mandalay range is made from 87.5% cotton and 12.5% silk blend jacquard on the face of the duvet, and 200 thread count cotton percale on the underside, making is soft and cosy to sleep under. The beautiful and delicate jacquard design on the cover is in a warm linen shade and has a luxurious silk yarn in the weave which gives it added lustre. I actually feel like I have a grown-up bed for once!

The duvet cover comes in a double, king or super-king size, and the pillowcases in either an Oxford square or Oxford rectangle size. The photos above are of the king-size with Oxford rectangle pillowcases. Priced at £159.00 for the duvet, and £45.00 for the pillowcase pairs, it's clearly a luxury bedlinen set, and in all honesty out of my normal budget. However, now I've experienced how soft, smooth and luxurious quality bedding like this is, I'll be hard pushed to cope with my supermarket polycotton again!

I was sent this product for the purpose of this review, my opinion is honest and unbiased.

The Chair, Again

The chair is the same.

Less padding in its seat now, but that's ok because there's more in mine.

The green cushion is squished out of all recognisable shape and could never be interpreted as ever having been square now.

But the chair is the same.

The tune on the mobile is the same.

Your dark eyelashes rest against your flushed cheeks in the same way that they did three years ago, but now those cheeks aren't as round or chubby. The Cupid's bow of your lips is more pronounced, your nose longer and taking shape. Your hair darker and more coarse.

Your face is still squished against me in the familiar manner of a child desperately seeking comfort from his mother, desperately trying to take the pain (of yet another wretched ear infection) away.

You curl an arm around my neck and pull yourself closer. Bring your knees up to your chest as I wrap my right arm around your lower half tighter to stop you from slipping. My left arm is burning with the strange angle it is contorted into to hold you close. Three years ago I could hold you with one arm nestled into me and type up a blog post with my right hand on my phone. Now I need both arms to hold you tight, while your legs dangle almost to the floor over the edge of my lap.

I contemplate my next move. How do I lift you enough to place you back into bed? Waking you is not my concern, the sheer effort of standing up while holding you is enough to consider. I tuck you in and smooth your hair, positioning Oliver Monkey under your arm. When did you become so big? Tonight has proven though that you won't stop being my baby for quite some time yet.

And the chair is still the same.

Gro-Clock (Review)

Earlier this year on twitter I expressed mild irritation concern at The Boy's inability to stay asleep in the early hours of the morning. He was going through a phase of waking at around 5.30am and not going back to sleep; we were all exhausted and life was becoming quite unbearable! Many, many people stepped forward and suggested a sleep training clock, and The Gro Company stepped in to send us a Gro Clock to try out on him.

Words cannot express how grateful I am to the wonderful folk of twitter and the ingenius person who invented the Gro Clock, for changing my son's early morning sleeping habits.

The Gro Clock is a small white clock made up of a circular display with digital images on it. During daytime or 'waking' hours it shows a yellow screen with an overlaid image of a smiling and awake sun, but at nighttime or 'sleeping hours' it displays a soothing blue screen with a snoozing star to remind a stirring child that it's still sleepy time. The adult sets the acceptable waking time in the clock and, once the nighttime button has been pressed to change the screen from the sun to the sleeping star, the display will continue to show the sleeping star (with miniature countdown stars around the outside edge) until the clock has reached the time set. At this point the sun wakes back up and takes over the display with the yellow background again.

With the clock comes a wonderful story which explains the way that it works via a setting of a pig who lives on a farm and is grumpy because he doesn't have enough sleep. This is a wonderful story, beautifully illustrated and it really explains to the children the important of getting enough sleep.

The Boy took to the clock very quickly and it has become firmly embedded into our bedtime routine. He understood the point of it very quickly, and it took around a month for him to realise that if it was still blue then it wasn't time to be awake. We did have a random week early on where The Boy would wake up and rather than go back to sleep he would lie awake waiting for it to change to yellow. As he had no idea how long it would be (and sometimes it was an hour!), this was a particularly infuriating point of the training. However, it then took a month for him to train himself to go back to sleep, with consistent reiteration from us that if the screen was blue he had to close his eyes again. Once he'd understood it and 'got the hang of it', then we were able to change wake-up time from 6 o'clock to 6.45am. This took another month as we took it very slowly and only changed it by an extra ten minutes or so each week.

We're now eight months on from starting to use the Gro Clock and I could not recommend it strongly enough to parents of toddlers or older children! Every time we go away (even if only for one night), the clock comes with us. It is so reassuring to hear The Boy tell me that he saw the clock was blue and so he went back to sleep!

The Gro Clock is available from a variety of high street stores or online directly for £29.99.

I was sent this product for the purpose of this review, my opinion is honest and unbiased.

Twinkle, Twinkle, It's Gone Too Far!

So while I'm in the mood for confessing to parenting fails, take a look at this photo of The Boy's beautiful bedroom and tell me the small issue…

photo

It's a small fail and you might not even register it as one. First look at all the things that are in the picture, work your way around the photo…

  • a soothing colour scheme with a rather lovely tree (even if I do say so myself) stretching over his bed
  • a monitor to hear his lordship if he wakes in the night
  • a fun bedset
  • cuddly toys
  • a bedguard to stop my gorgeous boy from falling out and hurting himself
  • Oliver Monkey
  • a soothing mobile

Which one shouldn't really be there? Which one is the item I feel is a parenting fail?

Some might argue it's the bedguard as apparently children need to learn how to not fall out of bed. Personally I'd rather The Boy do this without breaking his arm or nose, or by ending up with a black eye. Therefore the bedguard stays.

Surely the cuddly toys and Oliver Monkey aren't a problem? Every child has cuddly toys on their bed, and while they do tend to take up the bottom third of his bed, he is actually not occupying that space allowing Ludo, Peppa and friends to remain in situ.

I'm pretty sure no-one's going to try and argue with me about the monitor.

You'd be correct if you identified the soothing mobile as the problem. Next month, The Boy will be four and we are still using his cot mobile at night to help him get off to sleep.

I know.

We bought it before he was born and have used it every night since he arrived home. It plays three tunes although I have no recollection of what the first two are, as we have always found the third to be the magic melody; 'Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star'. For some reason it has always had the most soothing effect on him, and I still know all the verses to it from when I used to sing along with it when he was a baby. The mobile comes on holiday with us and for weekends away, to London, Cornwall, Butlin's, you name it and it's been there!

Occasionally we attempt a story CD or a gentle musical collection to try and coax him into the land of nod. 'Guess How Much I Love You' is his favourite, but the problem there is that he lies awake listening to it and then wants to start joining in with the actions. We humour him with it occasionally, hoping that he'll drift off quickly but it never seems to work, and we end up resorting to 'Twinkle'.

The main issue with using 'Twinkle' (aside from the fact that it is intended for babies) is that it runs off batteries, and I can't even begin to tell you how many we've bought over the past (nearly) four years. We've come to the conclusion that the cheap yellow ones from the Scandinavian furniture store are pretty pointless as they last about three days, and this is why we ended up buying some rechargeable batteries last year. They worked very effectively until my mum replaced them, didn't realise they were of the rechargeable variety and threw two of them in the bin.

And so we find ourselves facing the issue of what to do with 'Twinkle'. Do we try and phase her out? He surely can't still listen to her when he's 17?! Aside from anything else, the screws holding the battery compartment shut have no thread left on them and are a nightmare to unscrew.

Tell me; do you use music at bedtime? Does it help?

Please tell me you have a parenting fail?

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A Silent Night With A Chillow (Review)

"Constantly in search of the holy grail – sleep"

That's a description of me from my twitter bio, and two years after writing those fateful words they remain just as true.

Now don't get me wrong, I am far from incapable of falling, or staying, asleep. In fact, I'm naturally gifted at making myself go to sleep in most sedentary situations; on a train, on the sofa, in the car (not driving!), on the beach, you get the picture. Therefore the problem doesn't really lie in not being able to sleep, it's more about staying asleep once I've drifted off on that cloud.

Someone is determined to prevent me from having a full night's sleep. And he's about three and a half foot tall.

Although, to be fair to him he is not the only reason that I don't sleep as well as I used to; I also get incredibly hot in bed, very easily. We tend to counter this by having the window open throughout the year, and even in the depths of Winter use only a 7.5tog duvet. Still this doesn't always help.

Silentnight has carried out research which shows that 75% of adults are not getting a good night's sleep. I would hazard a guess that probably 60% of that group of people are parents and therefore have a small human interrupting their REM cycle on their behalf, but that does leave a whole group of people who sleep badly 'naturally'.

With the issue of my body temperature in mind, Silent Night sent me a 'Chillow Plus' to try out and to share my conclusions after a week.

P12981016a

The Chillow is a clever, albeit slightly bizarre concept. The pad measure slightly smaller than an average pillow and is designed to be slipped inside a pillowcase over the top of a conventional pillow, the Chillow Plus has velcro pads inside to hold it in place and prevent slippage during the night. Inside the plastic outer casing (the 'Hydro-soothe' membrane) is a Soothsoft® pad which uses 'specialised materials, fluids and laws of thermodynamics that creates a dry, powerless, thermo-regulating and memory foam effect'. It's basically a squidgy foam pad, but a bit more complicated.

To activate the cooling aspect of the Chillow you need to add 4 pints of warm tap water through the valve, reseal it and leave it to soak up the water and do its stuff for four hours. Once this has happened, then you need to remove the seal and roll it back up to push out any excess air. The Chillow is then ready for use. It works by absorbing body heat continually and then discharging the absorbed heat back to the surrounding environment. Strangely (and unlike a gel pack which needs refridgerating) it almost always feels cool as the user's body is is always warmer than the Chillow.

I've used the Chillow now for a week and has been extremely useful in cooling me down in a variety of situations, not just my head, and not just as night. I had a horrendous headache this morning and a lie down on the chillow for ten minutes really helped alleviate the pressure and fogginess. While the Chillow has been useful at night to lay my head on, it's actually been my feet that have benefitted most as they do tend to be excrutiatingly hot and painful at bedtime.

I only wish that I had owned this cooling pad during the last trimester of my pregnancy with The Boy when I suffered horrendously with Polymorphic Eruption of Pregnancy. I spent the final two months of pregnancy in absolute agony and crying; I was exhausted from a complete lack of sleep. At night, I had to sleep under a single sheet with ice packs against the part of my body that was in contact with the mattress because the increased heat made the rash worse. These ice-packs were exchanged ever hour or so for another one straight from the freezer. Only when I was freezing cold could I sleep. Having a Chillow would have seriously enabled my ability to sleep.

Thumbs up for the device which cools me down and allows me to sleep? Definitely!

I was sent this product for the purpose of this review, my opinion is honest and unbiased.

Days 62-68 of Project 365

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62. Shoot! (These are the seeds we planted a week ago in our gardening play table. They've really shot up, which means that I now have to find somewhere to move them to so they can acclimatise to the outside temperature. However, look to the back, the middle seed label was written by The Boy.)

63. The Sands of Time (We went for a long walk and cycle along Cardiff Bay Barrage today and played in the pirate play park there. We were the only people in the park for quite some time, which meant that The Boy had free rein over the sandy, sunken, pirate ship.)

64. Lick! (The first ice-cream of the year down the beach! The Boy had an eye-test today and he was meant to have eyedrops to test for a stigmatism, however because he held so still and was compliant during the test, he didn't need the drops which I was very relieved about. As a result it meant we were able to nip down to the beach and enjoy an ice-cream on the pier with nana.)

65. Bed Fellows (The Boy looked so peaceful when I went to check on him at midnight, so calm and serene. Oliver Monkey is never far away, and the week wouldn't be complete without a sleeping photo!)

66. Bubbles at Bathtime! (We had an extra long bathtime tonight where we had the bubble machine out, a pot of bubbles and the underwater light – all to remember a special little girl who loved bubbles.)

67. Catch The Pigeon! (Remember the Wacky Races song? Our weekly cycle ride along the pier was just like a scene from that today. The pier was deserted aside from a few elderly couples having their 'daily constitutional' and one or two brave pigeons. I say brave because once The Boy saw them he was determined to scare them away, something that made the grannies and grandads chuckle at!)

68.Splat! (We've been to Nymans for a National Trust event today as we are helping to promote the 50 Things To Do Before You're 11 and ¾ campaign. More to follow on this, and I've had to add this photo in at the last minute so please forgive any editing errors in this post!)

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Days 34-40 of Project 365

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34: 'Swinging' (The Boy learnt to pull himself up into his swing and then swing himself! All by himself! I'm so proud of him. He sat there happily swinging along while Mr. TBaM and I watched from our respective paused activities.)

35: 'Not Quite So Roar-y' (Quite possibly the most useless ride-on ever; cost £1 for a minute and barely moved. I'm not sure who was more unimpressed; me, mum or The Boy.)

36: 'The Paradise' (I had great fun creating this small world play beach for The Boy and he had great fun plopping the mummy and daddy into the sea. We made a miniature sandcastle and had a mini game of football with the Playmobil figures.)

37: 'Hopeful!' (We've been sent a Groclock for review and we started using it on the weekend after quite frankly the most ridiculous fortnight of early morning wake-ups. He's absolutely taken with it and loves watching it go to sleep. It does seem to be working because the morning after this photo was taken he woke at 5am and when he saw it was still night-time he went straight back to sleep until 7.35am!)

38: 'Sailing on the sea' (Grandad comes over to play with The Boy on a Thursday while I'm in work and Nana is looking after him, today they made this picture together with The Boy's tap-tap set.)

39: 'Pedal Power' (A quick trip to the beachfront after I picked him up from nursery and time to practise his bike riding. He's doing really well with it, steering well and staying steadily upright in his seat. The stabilisers are at the highest position they can be before removing them but he's not quite ready because he pedals too slowly. He's capable of pedalling faster but his problem is that he's too busy looking at the world around him and taking it all in to concentrate on the speed. And who can blame him?)

40: 'Wishing Well' (We've come away for the weekend to Weston-Super-Mare because I just need to get away from it all, we all do. It's not quite been the day I envisaged because it's über grey and drizzly, but we've had such fun! Off to see Mummy Mishaps and crew tomorrow!)

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Days 27-33 of Project 365

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27. 'One Giant Leap' (Off to Porthkerry Park on Sunday to play in the sunshine and check out how high the water was in the brooks.)

28. 'Hello, Down There' (a trip to the local Victorian park on the way back from the supermarket. This is part of our bid to spend 15 minutes outside in the fresh air every day, inspired by Jenny from Mummy Mishaps and Cerys from Nature and Play. Some days are really easy, other days – like a work day – are harder. Today was also the day of the epic play-dough making session; three colours and still he wanted more?!)

29. 'Do You Like My New Hat?' (Big activity day today, Tuesdays often are as I try to cram as much quality and quantity time in as possible before having to go back to work the next day. We made a wintery hat which ended up looking more like a space hat, did a science experiment involving moving water, went to gymnastics and also went scooting in the pouring rain in Cardiff Bay. Thanks for that Jenny and Cerys!)

30. 'New Jigsaw' (A work day but when I came home The Boy was able to play with his brand new jigsaw from Orchard Toys. Watch this space for a review!)

31. 'The Gruffalo' (Thanks to a 'heart-pressing' session when The Boy saw one of his friend's wearing a Gruffalo hat, he decided he wanted to dress up in his costume. I got the mirror down so he could see what he looked like. The irony was that five minutes later, the nanosecond I'd finished taking photographs, he insisted the costume came off. I think he scared himself!)

32. 'Slumber' (Absolutely exhausted, I let him have a longer nap today. I certainly paid for it as we had a ridiculous wake-up time of 5.20 this morning. Now where's that Gro-clock I was sent for review?!)

33. 'Rebel!' (We nipped down to Cardiff Bay Barrage for a cycle and a scoot in glorious sunshine, but dear God it was Arctic! The road across the barrage isn't used by vehicles and is a safe route for cyclists of all ages. The Boy has a minimal awareness of the highway code and road signs, clearly!)

My favourite photo of the week is The Gruffalo photo.

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